plus4chan
ImageboardsRadio
Site Theme...
imageboards
Main FAQ [ baw ] [ co / cog / jam / mtv / tek ] [ ck / coc / draw / writ ] [ pco / coq ] [ a / op / pkmn ] [ n ]
Long-Term Projects

 Posting a reply to post #12458
Name
Email
Subject  
Message
File 
Password  


File: 124348243492.jpg-(255.97KB, 810x1080, 1243462771854.jpg)
12458 No.12458
Official brainstorm thread for the medieval lesbians project, if you guys are still around. :) I like having this here, makes it much easier to keep track of.

Expand all images
No.12459
File: 124348261363.jpg-(102.57KB, 600x520, 1243470594714.jpg)
12459

No.12460
File: 124348263240.jpg-(151.26KB, 800x437, 1243472776536.jpg)
12460

No.12461
File: 124348265848.jpg-(225.47KB, 800x600, 1243474289222.jpg)
12461

No.12462
File: 124348267825.jpg-(176.65KB, 800x600, 1243475547409.jpg)
12462

No.12463
File: 124348270732.png-(346.28KB, 700x700, lesbiaaans.png)
12463

No.12464
File: 124348272684.png-(207.46KB, 700x700, 2.png)
12464

No.12465
File: 124348274244.png-(292.72KB, 700x700, 3.png)
12465

No.12467
File: 124348275789.png-(196.25KB, 700x700, 4.png)
12467

No.12478
cut/paste from original thread

Squire backstory:

Impoverished hedge knight, doesn't own much more than horse and armor. He's barely more than a peasant himself. He has a daughter from his now-dead wife, who he doesn't really want to "raise like a boy," but he doesn't really know any better. And he can't bear the thought of just abandoning her to a convent or somesuch.

King calls up his vassals for war (invasion, whatever), which happens to include the hedge knight. Or maybe he's not a vassal, but goes there basically as a mercenary. He's hoping to prove himself, and earn a more prestigious and profitable fief. But he's also self-conscious about his poverty, so he brings along his daughter to pose as his squire, to try to keep up appearances. Cuts her hair and dresses her as a boy; she already knows quite a bit about riding and even fighting, and secretly wants to be his squire anyway, because she loves her father and wants to emulate him.

Hedge knight is assigned to a troop of soldiers escorting the princess at some point. They get ambushed, hedge knight does along with most/all of the rest of the escort, squire helps the princess escape capture.

Ongoing tension ensues as she doesn't know whether to reveal her sex, which would probably separate her from the princess (she thinks), and also let down her father (because she wants to be a knight just like him).

No.12485
Copy pasta from Kingswing, to summarize all that we really confirmed so far:

Kingdom under siege King or Brother sends Princess with a small group of soldiers to ask for help from a friendly nation

Soldier die except for Squire, now it is up to Squire and the Princess to make the journey alone.

Squire is more worldly and open,while Princess is more privileged and sheltered

Thought the course of the Journey they fall in love and hot lesbian sexy time

that is all we got so far

No.12506
File: 124349648342.jpg-(178.73KB, 827x589, justacoupleofguys.jpg)
12506
Well, I do certainly love lesbians and I really really do like medieval stuff. But even so, you're gonna need more detail to get off the ground running with.

Anycase, I doodled ya a picture! It just so happens that I'm working on a sorta fantasy medieval setting with a young girl disguised as a squire so... yeah... I kinda just did a pallet swap.

Who did the first picture? It's kinda nice.

No.12510
Why is this so ad'awwable!

No.12516
I think we need to better identify the antagonising force that result in the need for the Princess' trek...

-An opposing kingdom wishing to expand its control?
-A rebeling faction of the kingdom hoping to spur a revolution?
-An highly organized pack of thevies/bandits ravaging the outer villages of the kingdom?

No.12517
>>12506
http://emstone.deviantart.com/

Someone posted it the other day on /co/ and it just got us brainstormin...

No.12518
>>12462
Goddamn. That is the most adorable thing I've seen all week.

No.12520
>>12516
I say opposing kingdom trying to expand control

No.12521
>>12506
Yeah we do need more detail, right now we just have bullets points for a plot. We were hoping we can get one of the fanfic writers to start working on dialogue and stuff.

No.12522
This is adorable.

>>12521
You guys don't have a writer yet? I might be able to offer some stuff.

No.12526
Original thread is not yet archived, it needs 2 more requests. It's id number was 9667922, so please make sure we get it archived so we can refer to it when needed. There were a lot of great ideas and theme suggestions in there.

No.12532
>>12526
Under review... Fingers Crossed

No.12535
I'm not exactly sure how thread archival works. But I do know they've been more or less ignoring /co/ threads for a while now.

No.12536
In case something happens and it doesn't get archived, I did save a copy of the thread:
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?znynnjyik0m

This idea made me feel all warm inside, though I don't know how much I can help in conjuring ideas.

No.12537
>>12536
Sweet you rock out loud,

Toss out ideas,even if they suck.

No.12538
>>12536
Awesome.

So the Squire is put in charge of the Princess and taking care of her and, due to mishaps, ends up being the only one in charge of her. After that, then what? Do they wander the woods, or are they still trying to get to the neighboring kingdom when lesbian sexytime happens?
And how should the Princess find out that Squire's really a girl? Accident, or should Squire tell her? Is it going to be 'Oh, I have a crush on this pretty boy, oh shit it's a girl but I still like her' deal?

No.12540
Do the Squire and Princess have names, or are we just going to be calling them Squire and Princess?

No.12542
>>12540
We're just using Squire and Princess as placer names though the original artist (http://emstone.deviantart.com/) referred to them as Iphis and Ianthe

No.12548
Is the original artist part of this or are we just riffing on her stuff?

No.12551
How did I not know about this? It's exactly the sort of thing I like.

Question: are we keeping this historical, or is there room for some subtle fantasy elements?

No.12552
>>12548
She's not part of this project, we're just continuing the concept presented in the orginal artwork...

>>12551
Sticking with historical, no mystical mumbo-jumbo

No.12555
>>12552
Yokay. I was just thinking how, thematically speaking, it would make sense if one or both of the girls got some kind of advice from a sagely old woman and I didn't know if she would be an actual witch or not.

No.12559
I am sick and numb of stories which try to have 'gay' as their hook

No.12561
>>12559
I'm not. Well, at least as long as I'm not paying for it.

No.12563
>>12559
It is a romance story, the hook is actually the fact that it is in medieval times.

Romances can only come in straight, gay, or freaky. You are tired of gay romance stories, but all the straight ones are still okay?

No.12564
>>12563
Well speaking for myself and not the other anon, I don't read romance stories. The closest thing I've enjoyed to a pure romance story has been either Wall-E or Shakespeare in Love. And both had fine hooks besides the wuv.

No.12567
>>12561
True, but then again I don't mind Twilight as long as I'm not paying for it

>>12563
The thing I'm sick of is people using a minority as a rare trait to put in their story
"Ooh look, its a medieval romance starring a blind disabled black princess and a bisexual hispanic with dwarfism!"

In my experience such stories usually lack traditional things such as.... plot and a coherent storyline, but your mileage may vary

No.12568
>>12563
Yeah, this. The story is 'there's these two lesbians, except one's a knight and one's a princess and it's set in olden days' instead of 'there's a knight and a princess in the olden days, but they're LESBIANS'
Since we're basing the story on their relationship, it makes sense to have the story revolve around the relationship.

No.12569
I just remembered: there are one or two cases of crossdressing lesbians in olden times who actually managed to marry their lovers and keep the true nature of their relationship secret. So this story can have a GOOD END while remaining historically accurate.

Oh God oh God please let there be a happy ending I've seen too many lesbian romances with BAD ENDs oh pleeease.

No.12573
>>12567
No that is just bad writing, using a minority as a rare trait to put in their story doesn't necessarily mean the plot will be bad. Trying to tell a story that doesn't revolve around Handsome White man meets Beautiful White girl doesn't mean the writer is resting on that idea alone to pass the story off as interesting.

No.12574
>>12569

She is cross dressing now? I thought we agreed we were not going the Mulan/ Yuri manga cliche route with this.

No.12578
It's mainly about them being very different in world views and lifestyles, and unexpectedly finding love. The ambiguity of roles in a homosexual relationship allows things a very different feel, so it's not just slapping a coat of paint on a similar boy/girl romance. The image of the princess raising the squire's sword to defend her when she is harmed stuck with several /co/mrades, myself included. The same idea would almost appear "cute" if she had spend the entire story being protected by a man, but as her protector has been a woman, the feeling of "she's just a girl" has been washed away by how capable the squire has been shown to be. This highlights their real differences, the fact that the princess has lead a pampered life and never before had to fight. It's the subtle things of that sort that make the story worth telling.

I have to say, I think Danielle Dreiberg's style is PERFECT for this. In just a few images we have a few of the key points and a good feel for how it would look overall. The two images of lovemaking are sensual but not "porny" which was something I was worried about derailing the project. Which, of course, is one of the reasons didn't attempt to draw stuff for it (that and my production speed is still rather slow).

No.12579
>>12574
Hmmm... Yeah I remember agreeing against that and going with something more along the lines of an unspoken truth

No.12580
>>12573
>doesn't necessarily mean the plot will be bad
Oh geez, then why is every story like that I come across bad?
Point me to some good ones before I lose my mind

>She is cross dressing now?
SEE
SEE!
I TOLD YOU

No.12581
>>12579
Wait, I'm a little confused by what you're implying here. Are you saying that at some point everyone will know that they're two girls but no one will ever say anything about it? Because that's fine too, but it would take a lot more suspension of disbelief given the social mores of the time.

No.12586
>>12581
I was thinkning they accepted her for whatever reason to become a soldier. I thought it was something like they needed soldiers and they were past the point were they cared about gender and cared more about actual ability. The war had taken such a toll that they ran out of able body men to form a respectable fighting force and would take anyone who offered. But I am not in charge, if you are willing to actual pen something do whatever you want. It will at least be a step to getting this accomplished.



>>12580then why is every story like that I come across bad?

Because you read garbage? Or we have different taste I really don't know

Daredevil is a superhero story...but the hook is he is blind (they used a rare minority). You can read Annie on My Mind, that was a good book and had lesbians, you can read Strangers in Paradise that had a lesbian main character . Hulk is about a mentally retarded man with radiation poisoning.

No.12588
>>12586
Hmm. I was basing my view of the situation primarily on what's written here >>12478

I understand that the Sweet Polly Oliver story is a cliche, but it's also a tried-and-true staple of classical literature, much like princess/knight romances. If we're not going to use it, then we'll have to sacrifice a little historical accuracy, which I'm also perfectly fine with. Did we even decide that this was all taking place in actual medieval England and not some fictional stand-in with subtly different societal standards?

>>12580
I forget the title, but there was this cute little indie comic about the mummy of an Egyptian pharaoh falling in love with a young lady in Victorian London. It didn't seem bad at all, despite its "gimmick."

I wish Danielle was here. She'd know what to do.

No.12592
>>12586
He may be blind the way we see but he has like RADAR superpowers

Thats like saying cyclops or storm are a rare minority

Read strangers in paradise, horrible shit. That is exactly the type of thing I'm talking about
Its like CAD nut instead of videogames its <insert offensive gimmick here>

>hulk
Are you even trying?

>>12588
I'll keep an eye out for it, sounds ok

No.12594
>>12592
>>He may be blind the way we see but he has like RADAR superpowers

Sure he can compensate for his disability, but it's easy to imagine that his character concept probably started out as "let's make a blind superhero." Yes, it was a gimmick, but it led to a good character.

No.12614
File: 124369567674.jpg-(81.09KB, 600x438, medivallesbians0.jpg)
12614
I'm no Danielle, but I was inspired by the project to doodle these out.

No.12615
File: 124369574695.jpg-(131.39KB, 450x608, medivallesbians1.jpg)
12615

No.12616
File: 124369577097.jpg-(147.36KB, 800x642, medivallesbians2.jpg)
12616

No.12617
>>12614
>>12615
>>12616
+A my good sir and/or madam.

No.12619
>>12592
>>hulk
>Are you even trying?

Twas a joke good sir


>>12616>>12615>>12614
I would blow you if it were at all possible!

No.12620
So do we have a setting/story yet?
We have the Squire, raised with boyish tendancies by her single father, though while not a true crossdresser, is allowed to disguise herself as a boy to fight for the king, due to both lack of men and respect for her father.
Other kingdom attacks. King sends Princess out to next kingdom for protection, with Squire as her personal bodyguard since no funny business could ever happen between girls (do ho) and with a larger guard group. Guard group gets attacked, everyone dies except Squire and Princess and now they have to make their way to the next kingdom on their own.
Squire, raised in a more worldly fashion, tries to educate the sheltered Princess. (Would this be in a 'you're kinda dumb and it's cute and funny' way or the more common 'Squire has her way, Princess has her way and they bicker over it until sexytiems')
At some point they get attacked and Squire gets badly hurt and Princess has to take care of her, which is the emotional climax. At another (different?) point the Princess has to fight to protect Squire.
This about right for most of it? It doesn't seem like an endings been figured out yet, but if that's about right I might be able to rough draft something up tonight.

No.12640
>>12620
Yes that is right so far, ending is completely up to you

YOU ROCK OUT LOUD btw

No.12655
Ok, I had some random ideas to day, so I'll submit them to you now:

Rival kingdom is lead by a Count that wants to expand, but has until now been a long standing friend to the kingdom. The story begins the assassination of the princess's brother, and the failed attempt on her father. The situation is heating up for a full war, and the king's champion (the squire's commander) is prepping for war to save the kingdom. The first attack on the princess doesn't kill everyone except her and the squire, but it does kill many and separate them from the champion and any other knights. Love stuff ensues, the get word that the king has been killed by an assassin.

As the last living member of the royal family, the princess is not safe while the count lives. They decide to take fate into their own hands, and take out the count before the champion leads an attack. They dress as nursemaids and infiltrate the castle, cornering the count. He explains that they can kill him, but doubts they will kill his reason for attacking: his newborn twin sons. Having seen to many small kingdoms fall into ruin in such a situation, he plans avoid tension between his sons by giving them both enough land to rule, and for that he needs the other kingdom. Frustrated, but unwilling to kill the babies or leave them fatherless, they leave, with the count's blessing and apology no less.

Finally reunited with the champion, who has amassed all the knights to crush the count's army, the princess asks him to lay down his arms. She sees that open war would lead to more death and loss then she can stand, and she can't bring herself to take vengence when she knows the price. She asks that he say she died, and that he serve the people of the land. He agrees, and the last pages show the squire and princess, older and living as a couple on a quiet farm. The two kingdoms are one, with no war.

No.12656
>>12655
I realize it's FULL of typos, but I'm pretty tired and knew I'd forget the details if I didn't type it real fast.

No.12657
>>12655
Hmm... Good, good, but I'm not quite sold on this. Let's keep tossing ideas around and see what sticks and what gets discarded.

No.12658
Another possible story bit (probably best to take place after the initial story)

Squire hurts her leg after a horse riding accident and Princess tries to adapt some of her walking etiquette lessons to help Squire rehabilitate

No.12663
>>12655
While we do need a conclusion, I'm not sure I'm entirely sold on that one yet. Sneaking back into the castle, and the Count showing them his sons instead of just killing them right there is a little... well, it doesn't seem to fit the story.
I'm not sure what to suggest, I don't like the idea of raising an army either. Maybe the King doesn't get killed, and they have to hide out until the war's over and then what?

No.12665
Something that just occurred to me: we seem to be ignoring Squire's father, the Knight. After all, he's the reason that she got caught up in this whole ordeal in the first place.

If you ask me, we shouldn't kill him off. The trauma of losing her only parent, combined with the innate stress of the situation, would likely weigh Squire down to the point where romance would be near-impossible. Instead, what if he's captured? I might be remembering this wrong, but I think the medieval code of honor had provisions for taking enemy knights captive. That way there's a secondary goal besides rescuing the Princess, thus opening up the plot for more possibilities.

No.12666
>>12663
Well, the entire point I see behind him not being a just plain evil villain is that he's doing what he thinks is best for his sons, no matter the cost. With the situation as it had become, and knowing that she can never continue her own family line since she loves the squire, it would be the final choice between her duty and her desire for personal happiness. We could back this up by an argument between the squire and the princess as to what makes the kingdom: the royalty or the peasantry.

I was also thinking the champion, or the squire's father could be seen visiting them in them on their farm in the end, wearing the colors of the new joined kingdom. This would symbolize that, having survived the take over, the knights have insured the safety of the peasants during the transition, and their traditions have been incorporated into the new combined knighthood.

If a truly vile villain is needed, and must die, then we could develop the assassin. Course, it's just a suggestion, and hopefully will start some good discussion.

No.12667
>>12665
It was very common practice to take defeated knights prisoner, because if someone can afford a horse and armor, he most likely has a household which can afford a ransom.

No.12670
I realized that there is no reason the captain of the knights can't be the squire's father. This would put him very close to the King, in fact they could be good friends. That would also allow the king to know right off that the squire is a girl and, since she is the 'son' of a close friend, why he trust her to protect his own daughter.

>>12655
Cut out the part about her having a brother. Adds an unneeded character and complicates things too much. I figure an attempted assassination would be enough to get the King on alert and focus protection on his daughter.

How about, since it's done through assassins or bandit gangs, they don't know right off who is against them? That way, the very kingdom they are going to seek aid from is the count who ordered the attacks. Not sure how they will discover that the count is behind it all, however (that'll take more thinking).

No.12671
>>12667
This could mesh with the idea of the Knight being relatively poor for someone of his social status.

No.12672
>>12670
>>How about, since it's done through assassins or bandit gangs, they don't know right off who is against them? That way, the very kingdom they are going to seek aid from is the count who ordered the attacks. Not sure how they will discover that the count is behind it all, however (that'll take more thinking).
I like this a lot. It's not the same old "oh no our enemies are attacking who could have seen that coming."

One thing I'm curious about, though: why would it be necessary for anyone to know Squire's gender for her to be assigned to protect Princess? I assumed that she was just following her father around, and she only ended up as Princess's protector when everyone else got killed/captured/separated.

No.12673
>>12672
Someone suggested it to show the king being over protective of his daughter, and not wanting any boys too close to her.
>>12620
This post mentions it as well. I'm not sure how much of a deal everyone wanted to make out of it, perhaps even just have those in the castle know and not have a problem with it. Perhaps even have some of the castle staff comment how hard it must be for a girl to be a knight's 'son'. Basically, people who don't know her would assume she's a boy just because the squire outfit and such, while everyone who knows her personally knows she a girl.

No.12674
>>12673
Yeah, I see it that she's just sorta deemed the exception to the rule sort of thing.

>>12670>>12665
I like the tweeeest of the 'savior' kingdom actually being the baddy and the dad getting kidnapped instead of killed. When the girls find out could be either a) initial attack on the group that gets them seperated/captured, b)when they go to saved Squire's dad or c) when they get to the neighbouring kingdom and find out 'oh shit' and then have to escape or fight them off or whatnot.

Another idea is that the opposing kingdom is doing a sort of double cross, when they have half their army disguised and fighting as a different kingdom, then offers their aid to secure the Princess (to marry her?, ransom? idk)

No.12675
All of these are great ideas, I just hope they aren't too complex to put into one comic. Handling so many elements correctly requires alot of work. While I of course wouldn't mind it being several comics long, I want to be realistic. I doubt we can get any draw fag or writefag (is that a term?) to actually work on several comics or one HUGE comic.

That is why i am in favor of a more straight forward story.

No.12676
>>12675
skill + fag is the acceptable way to address or comment on someone with a skill. It can also be used as a verb ("I was drawfagging all night") or to denote the work of a skillfag ("This is some solid codefaggory").

I will admit, right now, I'm looking at a 60+ page story. That's rushing through the intrigue and taking proper time for the romance and character development. I've written and outlined a 120 page comic before, didn't get around to fully drawing it. I got a lot more on my plate these days (been helping on various projects related to /tg/, including a playtest I'm running for the next month) but if I will at least continue to post my ideas and suggestions. If I have time for more, I'll do more though. I mainly want to be sure we have a pretty good consensus before I proceed in any major way towards fully writing it out.

No.12737
>>12676
Can't wait to read it

No.12740
>>12676
>>skill + fag is the acceptable way to address or comment on someone with a skill. It can also be used as a verb ("I was drawfagging all night") or to denote the work of a skillfag ("This is some solid codefaggory").
Someday, I hope a linguisticsfag comes to document the Chans as an example of how languages change through insularity.

No.12894
>>12676

I was serious when I said I can't wait to read it. I CAN"T WAIT I WANT IT NOW!

or

Any progress so far buddy?

No.13100
>>12894
Honestly... not really. I've been knee deep in playtesting a /tg/ project (which oddly had a borderline lesbian moment that was interesting). I have been thinking about this off and on though, maybe I should take sometime just to get an outline down. I guess it would be alot easier to dive into it once I have something I can show everyone and ask "do you guys like this idea?" I'll pop in a DVD and get my ideas going. Now... where did that put my Berserk boxset....

No.13102
Ok, kinda got a basic set up for the start, along with a few ideas for the rest (hope to get more detail in later).

*Princess, alone, enjoying a quiet time in a field
*The assassination attempt on the King, crossbow bolt. Deflected by Captain of the guard, knights on alert.
*Assassin flees, knocks over Princess. She sees his face
*King and Captain having formal conversation on matter, King most concerned with his daughter's safety. Knights dismissed.
*King and Captain continue, much less formally. King wants his daughter protected, suggest the Captain's 'son'. Explains his fatherly concerns.
*Squire arrives, talked about and greeted by others. Seen only in bits or silhouette.
*Princess talking to maid brushing her hair, about her concerns and worries about having a fulltime bodyguard.
*Maid tells her that the Captain's son will surprise her, Squire appears.
*Captain and King talking about the plain to get aid, pan outside to Princess and Squire talking.
*1-2 pages of talking, ends with Captain approaching them.
*Group sets off, overlayed by explanation of the plan to send the Princess to request aid from a friendly kingdom.
*1-3 pages of more talking
* Bandits, 3-5 pages. Squire should be an impressive, but very unconventional fighter. Not needed that she scores many kills, incapping and entangling enemies to escape is fine.
*Princess and Squire are separated, maybe a short montage of camping until they end up taking refuge in a small farming village.

That's basically the first half. They have to fall in love while living the farm life, and make love in their bed on the upper level of the barn. I kinda wanted a cute page where the Princess is jealous after seeing the Squire talking to a boy, and the Squire quickly picks up on it and comforts her.

This is about when the bandits would attack the village and lead to a fight in the barn, the Squire using ever farm impliment and bit of junk to defeat foes until she's wounded. With the time the Squire bought, the Princess recovers the sword and confronts the bandits. While unable to do much, she buys time for the villagers to save them both (this will help enforce the importance of the peasants). Upon recovering from her injuries, the Squire finds the Princess crying because the news has come that her father has been killed. Not knowing a way to protect the Princess by herself, Squire determines they must complete the mission, and hope that there is no danger with the bandits defeated. Upon arriving (in normal disguises as peasants) the Princess sees and identifies the assassin talking to the Duke, and the figure it all out. Then the ending I described before (so I don't have to type it again). Last page reflects the quite first page, but this time they are together, leading a simple life.

No.13103
Ok, to explain a few of my reasons for things. I first thought of a page or two explaining more about how the King and Captain are good friends, maybe even a flashback to their youth to start out. But the leads wouldn't be in ANY of those pages, and I wanted to keep that to a minimum. Just a basic bit of self editing. I also didn't put in the idea of the Captain being kidnapped. It's a good idea, but it adds another instance of the leads being proactive, instead of reactionary. Saving the proactive stuff til the climax makes it a bit more powerful, I think, and I have a pretty good idea for parts of the barn fight, and not some "bandit hideout" fight. So, this is my first draft, of the first third/half of the idea, focused on keeping the leads on almost every page (and mentioned on the ones they don't show up on) and keeping it as sweet and short as possible. I'll try to work on the rest later.

No.13286
>>13102
Sounds awesome

No.14088
Wow, awesome thread.
I wish to see more of this.

No.14239
>>14088
Me to

No.14240
>>14239
>>14088
thirded.

No.14244
They need someone else to travel with them.

A person that keeps walking in on them, and cockbocking them. It could be funny.
Perhaps, a little kid they find along their travels, an orphan who was left for dead in a decimated town.

No.14268
File: 124683990317.jpg-(103.91KB, 1169x829, princessxsquiredraft01.jpg)
14268
I did a few quick layouts, may try to do some more when I have time. I definitely will if these help along the creation of full pages. If the basic idea I have is enough to get an artist dedicated to it, then I'll work on laying it all out with all possible haste. Both the drawfags who tied to this are perfectly acceptable in my opinion, and I would not be against them working together as long as they could figure out the best way to share the load. If the project got a good start and kept a good pace, I wouldn't even be against doing a bit of it, if I could produce something closer in style to the others. Basically, I'm saying I'm gung ho for this project, if I know others are there to back me up.

Here is my layout for the first page and the final page, to highlight the similarities. Look at it first, then if my sketches are so terrible that you can't make it out, here is the quick breakdown:

first page:
p1: Sunrise on a beautiful day. There is a beautiful flower in the foreground and a gentle hill in the back, with the princess walking over it. Wind is gently blowing her dress and hair.
p2: Close up of flower, the morning dew glistening on it.
p3: The princess looks happy, content.
p4: Close of the princess picking the flower. Her hands should look as delicate as possible, almost as though they should be unable to even pluck a flower from the ground.
p5: The princess leaning back on a tree, the sun rising in the background.

last page
p1: The gentle fields that the two leads grow, a beautiful flower in the foreground. The princess is stepping from the tall grass, the wind catching her hair and dress. The sun is setting off panel.
p2: A gloved hand is picking the flower from the ground with ease.
p3: The princess is overjoyed, her smile beaming.
p4: The squire, holding the flower out to her/the reader. Though a young woman, her look is that of a suave man of the world, confident and in love.
p5: The sun sets in the background, the princess lays back against the squire who in turn leans against a tree. The squire holds the flower for the princess, the princess's face is turned slightly back, as though they are about to kiss, or have just kissed.

No.14269
File: 124684093547.jpg-(133.73KB, 1090x850, princessxsquiredraft02.jpg)
14269
Ok, here are pages 2 and 3. I was still warming up with 2, so I have some correction notes for the final art, but 3 is just how I want it for the most part. Dialog is subject to change, as I others may have better ideas for it. That goes for any and all layouts and script ideas I have, as I don't want to make it unappealing to those who have worked on this so much so far. Still, I am taking the initiative and going to attempt to put out the best stuff I can.

Page 2
p1: King and Captain on horseback, knights behind then.
-King: Good Captain, where has my daughter gotten off to?
p2: Captain looking towards the tree in the background, the glint of metal reflecting the sun catching his eye.
-Captain: My lord, she is....what the devil!
p3: The assassin, using the brush for cover, his crossbow ready.
p4: The crossbow bolt sails through the air!
p5: The king, seeing the bolt as it speeds towards him, his reaction of shock and fear as he is too late to move.
p6: The captain unsheaths and swings his sword in one motion, slicing the bolt in two and killing it's momentum.
p7: The king is dazed as the captain and the knights get to action. The captain orders men toward the assassin while two guard the king, looking very much like secret service in chainmail.
-Captain: It came from the brush! You men guard his highness, you men with me!

Page 3
p1: Princess is startled by the shouts, and the noise of rustling bushes behind her.
p2: Princess in fore, shocked by the assassin as he chrages through the bush, twigs and leaves catching and breaking at his passing.
p3: Princess is knocked off her feet as the Assassin rushes past.
p4: Assassin looks back and yells at princess as he runs, his face clear and grotesque.
-Assassin: One side, brat!
p5: Assassin flees over the hill, his cloak billowing from his speed.
p6: The captain and other knights arrive, halting in concern for the Princess. The princess is on the ground, looking bewildered at the path the assassin took.
-Captain: Princess! Are you alright, M'lady?

No.14281
ooh...nice panel layout.

Waiting when you finalized it...

No.14285
>>14268 >>14269
Ok, these are just awesome.
Can't wait to see more of this.

No.14299
>>14244
That doesn't sound funny, it just sounds cliche and horrible...like something you would see in a bad kids film.

No.14303
Ideas like a cuntblocker and a badass horse are interesting on different levels, but ultimately what I'm going to try to do is make this as short as possible. If the artist would like to dedicate the time to developing some of these ideas more, I'm open to fleshing things out some. As is, I'm more concerned about keeping motivation in all parties (myself included) throughout the whole project. For example, I mentioned a 2 page conversation between the Captain and the King, which for the layouts (I'll scan it later) has been reduced to one page. Mostly cause, no matter how likable I make them, they are not the focus of the story, and not the reason anyone is involved. I realized as I was about to do the outline that I simply didn't want to spend so much time with the girls not on the page, and delaying the arrival of the squire by even one page seemed like a total act of foolishness. I'll do my best to be bold when it comes to cutting things that distract from the main story (two very different people falling in love) and remain open to any new ideas that help that idea along. I worry about keeping the balance once I introduce the characters of the small village they will take shelter in, as those characters would have to be developed enough to be sympathetic, but take over the whole of the story. Oh well, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

No.14313
>>14299
Yeah, after I posted that I realized that it was a bit cliche. However, I do think they need someone else to intereact with.
Maybe an older knight, someone that covers up for them.
He understands their dilema perhaps? Hell, maybe he was in love with a fellow knight when he was younger, but was killed, or something like that.

No.14314
>>14313
I think it works best with just them. The whole appeal of this is that it's a cute little love story between these two characters, not an epic tale with a cast of thousands.

No.14315
>>14314
I'm just throwing ideas I saw someone posting pics at /co/ and came here to see if there was more.
I find it suprising that it was pretty much dead, so thats why I bumped it, asking for more.

No.14326
All things considered, I think even the ideas we reject are helpful, since it helps clarify what the story is and isn't. I remember the idea of a lesbian villain being mentioned in the first thread, but I and others were adamantly against it. I think we struck a good feel for the idea now, which isn't overly sexual (though the love scene will be very sensual) or slapstick (though there is much room for humor). So, certainly toss out your ideas, and don't be offended if a thought is rejected. Afterall, it might be an idea you can use in a different project.

No.14355
File: 124702356683.jpg-(137.50KB, 1097x850, princessxsquiredraft03.jpg)
14355
Some more consolidation. As I said before, I cut the 2 page conversation between the Captain and King down to 1 page, and the page of people talking to or about the Squire while the Princess talks about the situation with her maid have been combined. Just basic flow became alot clearer as I laid it out. I'll type up a detailed description to go with the panels later.

No.14384
>>14355
Looking good.
But yeah, throwing ideas around can't be that bad.

No.15254
File: 124855821046.jpg-(88.66KB, 936x680, princessxsquiredraft04.jpg)
15254
Here we have the reveal of the squire page, and the first page of talking between the princess and the squire. The second to last panel involves the princess lamenting that she doesn't have a 'handsome boy' as her guardian. The last panel is the squire joking "Ah, but my dear princess, despite being a girl, I AM a handsome boy!" as she takes a fair amount of pride in how good looking a squire she is. It's also my favorite little joke so far, and her face there almost wants a "BWAHAHAHAHA" added to the panel (but that would be a bit much).

No.15327
File: 124866405016.jpg-(71.26KB, 301x452, lg6865.jpg)
15327
Keep going, stranger.

No.15456
File: 124883412634.jpg-(89.26KB, 936x680, princessxsquiredraft05.jpg)
15456
Ok, here we have the next pages. I decided the princess would make some comment about a boy being able to get her the best apple on the tree. I was thinking a green one surrounded by red ones, or the other way... then I realized I wasn't sure apples trees did that. Eitherway, if someone knows, chime in. So Squire climbs the tree like a monkey, and they talk about other things a bit. I have a love of drawing the squire doing nutty shit or making faces, and I think I got a good bit of that in.

It ends with the Captain and King arriving to tell them they thought of a plan (sending her as a messenger to the other kingdom) and the squire hanging from the tree with apple in hand. With this set of pages, I'm not sure when I'll work on this more. It's the first 9 pages and the last, ready for an artist to start, or at least comment on if they are liking it. But as it is, I haven't seen mention of the artist here in a long while, so I'm not sure who is still interested. If no one is interested, that means I have to fully draw it to see it done, and I have another project I'm working on that I need to devote some time too. If the artist resurfaces, then count on me wrapping this stuff up as fast as I can. I do believe this comic has a lot of potential, but I know I won't have time to fully draw it for a long time. If we have an artist though, I am fine with keeping up on the writing and layout duties.

No.18247
So.... I should basically just get on this if I ever want to see it finished, eh? Darn, I was really hoping to let someone else do all the heavy lifting.

No.18251
>>18247
>Darn, I was really hoping to let someone else do all the heavy lifting.

HA! HA! Seriously though, nice work you've got here.

No.19404
>>15456

just out of curiosity, how come the "page boy hairdo" is mostly a female thing those days?

No.22819
Because it's less acceptable for priests to fuck pageboys, so it's less appropriate for boys to have it.



395 posts omitted. First 100 posts shown.
Main FAQ [ baw ] [ co / cog / jam / mtv / tek ] [ ck / coc / draw / writ ] [ pco / coq ] [ a / op / pkmn ] [ n ]
0.11415600776672 (0.11 seconds )