"Uhhh... Hold on one second. We need to turn around."

"No, wait... This isn't right. What the hell...?"

"Okay, you guys! Speech time! Our final battle awaits! Lance is right ahead of us, and we've all been preparing for this day! The time has come! We'll never have a better opportunity! We'll-"

"Oh hey is that a Pokecenter up there?"

"Thank you kindly."

Nurse Joy: Of course! Have a good day.

"Anyway! Destiny, chosen ones, glory of the fallen, golden opportunity, you get the idea! Now the question is... WHICH TEAM DO I TAKE?"

>CHOOSE YOUR FIGHTERS

Is anyone going to decide my team for me?

HOW MANY SLOTS ARE THERE OPEN

>>22513
FIVE.

>>22514
GYARADOS, EXEGGUTOR, ZAPDOS, HITMONLEE, FEAROW

"YOU SIX! You're gonna lead us into battle!"

"..."

"Not with those levels, though. Especially you, Magbastard."

"Been holding onto these."

Curry: Cheater.

"Shut up! Grinding is boring!"

Blimey that was fast. Worth learning?

Right, forget it. Anyway!

"Oh my gosh, training you will be the easiest thing in the world."

"Holy shit..."

Curry: Arceus damn, he didn't even have a personality yet...

"HE WAS SO YOUNG! DAMN YOU, RANDOM ENCOUNTER MACHOP!!"

"I guess... We need a replacement, huh?"

Sollux: didn't think it w0uld be this fast.

>>22521
Drowzee, you still don't really HAVE a Psychic up there in the levels. Go fix that.

"Well, this isn't too bad."

Shnoz: I'd like it if you didn't use Poison Gas that much, because of my asthma.

"Delightful."

Shnoz: I'm not really sure about this, what if he attacks my bad knee?

"Just fry his mind with Psychic energy..."

What level should I be aiming for here, anyway? 50? 60? Because we might have to call it early, as grinding is BORING AS HELL and I'm not going to subject you to that.

"Shnoz?"

Shnoz: I don't think this is covered by my insurance...

"Shnoz? How ya feelin'?"

Shnoz: ... Oh Arceus, this is terrible. Now I'm going to have to get a new ID card and get all my prescriptions under a different species... So much paperwork. Is something wrong, Wayne?

"Let's just... keep grinding."

Curry: NOW we're talkin'! Let's go, GIR!

GIR: GARGLE

Curry: Well put!

Curry: Ngh... You've got Antidotes, right?

"Uhhhhhh it's been a while... I'm not sure..."

Curry: DAMN IT, IF I DIE FROM THIS AMATEUR-HOUR BULLSHIT, I'M GOING TO HAUNT YOU FOREVER!

"Aaaaand Curry's done for now."

Nurse Joy: We certainly are seeing you a lot here!

"Yeah. I don't wanna talk about it."

To cut down on the grind-a-thon, I'm just gonna call it. I'll finish up, and do another additional 50 posts on Sunday at 8 again! Sorry for putting you all through this!

>>22531
Also, it's worth noting, now that I'm out of school for goodsies, my evening schedule is much more open.

>>22532
Good to hear. Sorry I missed it, I was working late.

Damn. Sorry I forgot. I'll be here for the next one hopefully.

ONE POWERFUL TRAINING SESSION LATER

"we're ready."

"First, though, we stock up on our items! Can't be too unprepared!"

"They're the last defense between us and Lance. What do you say guys, can we do it?"

Curry: Damn right we can!

Sollux: ready whenever y0u are.

GIR: BLARGRAGA!!

Shnoz: Oh I hope this isn't too stressful. I have a bad heart.

Zeus: LET US DO BATTLE!

Pat: FOR THE EMPEROR!

ROUND ONE

Lorelei: You've done well to make it this far, but your journey ends here.

"Let's count the number of times I've heard that! Or something similar."

THE WHEEL OF FATE IS TURNING
HEAVEN OR HELL?!

Lorelei: And I specialize in Ice-Type Pokemon.

Curry: Ice-Types, eh? Heheheheh...

Curry: And FIRE'S MORE POWERFUL!

GET READY TO BRAWL!

FIGHT!

"Roast 'em, Curry!"

Lorelei: Go, Dewgong!

Dewgong: SURF.

Curry: Fffffuck.

"Alright, plan B!"

Curry: But Water won't do shit against Ice.

"Yeah, but Ice won't do shit against Water. It balances. Ugh, this is gonna be tougher than we thought."

"How ya feelin, GIR?"

GIR: BRRRRRRRR!!

"You know what? Fuck it. HYPER BEAM HER ASS!!"

Curry: is this going to be your strategy?

"Fuck no, I've only got five shots on that!"

>>22556
FOOL! Ice is neutral to Water! Water resists Ice!
But Flying is weak to Ice! You've hit a stalemate!

"GIR needs a breather... Shnoz! Show your stuff!"

Shnoz: Oh dear, the cold is affecting my allergies.

"STOP COMPLAINING AND USE FUTURE SIGHT!"

"... Wow, that ended up working out pretty good for us, huh?"

"And now it gets annoying..."

"Wait a minute... Slowbros aren't Ice-Types! Just Water and Psychic! ... PAT, GET IN HERE!"

Pat: BATTLE TIME!

"There's only one thing to do at this point."

"GIIIIIIGAAAAAA DRAAAAAIIIIIN!"

"And then there was one... Jinx. Jinx isn't a Water-Type. She's just Ice."

Curry: My turn.

Curry: Burn with me.

Jynx: EEEEYYYYAAAAHH! MY SKIIIIIIIN!!

"Wow! That was... surprisingly easy!"

Sollux: except f0r the fact that our str0ngest teammate didn't get t0 sh0w up until the end.

Curry: Eh, I'll do more next time.

"And yet they are!"

Lorelei: But I've never lost! My perfect win record, vanquished at your hands! I- I'm not worthy! You have to kill me, it's the only way.

"Yeeeeaaaaaah no, I'm just gonna walk through this door. Weirdo."

"MY YOU'RE A LARGE MAN!"

Bruno: My might muscles will be used in many deadly ways to rend your flesh from your bones!

Pat: I LIKE HIM! HE IS VIOLENT!

"Fighting-Types, you say? Well, there's no way to screw this one up."

Sollux: all us flying-types.

"So many. Sollux, you take charge this time."

"MOTHERFUCKER!"

Sollux: fantastic.

"GIR, GET IN HERE!"

"Okay, that's more like it. SOL, YOU'RE BACK IN!"

"FLY- Oh that was fast."

Sollux: yeah i figured that was what y0u wanted me t0 d0.

"AND AGAIN!"

"..."

Sollux: he's fast.

"HE'S ALSO HUGE, HOW DO YOU MISS?! *Sigh* try again."

"This could be bad... If that guy gets to attack first, then..."

"Welp! No need to worry! FINISH 'EM OFF, SOLLUX!"

"BRING OUT THE NEXT ONE!"

"WOMBO COMBOOOOOOO!!"

"AND GIR, FOR THE FINISH!"

"SUUUUUUUUUUURF!"

GIR: BLOOGITTY!

"You're taking this a lot better than Lorelei."

Bruno: Did she ask you to kill her?

"Yeah."

Bruno: I'll go talk to her...

"Wow, one of Lance's top-rankers is an old lady?"

"You heard nothing but lies, I know no one by that name."

Agatha: Relax, child. I'll expose your connection to Oak only if I defeat you.

"But if you defeat me, then you'll kill me."

Agatha: So you have nothing to lose!

"That's distressingly logical."

"Whoa, ew! No need to go THERE!"

Agatha: Alright, you miserable whelp! It's go-time! As the kids say. My Ghost-Types will crush you!

>Every Ghost-Type in this region is also Poison-Type

"........... PAT, SHNOZ, YOU'RE UP!"

"CONFUSION. Aw, it didn't finish her!"

"Whoohoo! It confused her!"

"Aw, damn it, she healed up."

"Whoohoo! That finished her off! Oh, but you're switching out. SHNOZ, YOU'RE IN!"

"Shnoz-"

Shnoz: I-

"Whatever you're complaining bout, shut up and use PSYCHIC!"

"Damn, Agatha. Your Pokemon are sturdy."

Agatha: I train them well!

"NOT STURDY ENOUGH! PSYCHIC AGAIN!"

"Okay, gotta get Shnoz back up to full, Zeus, get in there and take a few hits."

Zeus: I'LL DO MORE THAN TAKE HITS, YOUNG WAYNE! OBSERVE!

"Rock on, that's pretty helpful. Almost forgot you had that. Just one second and I can switch you out."

"... Zeus? Oh for the love of..."

*DRAGONZORD FLUTE*

Zeus: I APOLOGIZE! I'LL MAKE THIS GHOST PAY FOR PUTTING ME TO SLEEP! HUZZAH!

Zeus: TASTE MY BEAK, FOUL SPECTRE! HOORAH!

"Y'know what, Shnoz? You can... stay outta this one. He's got it covered."

Zeus: AND ONCE MORE! FIRST I PARALYZE THEM, AND THEN...

Zeus: THEY TASTE MY BEAK!

"I think we get it. There's beak tasting."

Zeus: AND THEN THEY COLLAPSE! HAHA!

Agatha: Lance is the only one standing in your way now. You have my permission to challenge him, but don't think it'll be easy.

"We'll see about that."

Agatha: Just make sure you're prepared, that's the only advice I'll give you.

"PLENTY of items to spare here."

"We're all healed up, ready to go! Let's do this, guys!"

"No turning back. Are YOU ready?"

Curry: As we'll ever be.

"Oh Arceus, he's wearing a cape."

Sollux: capes are intimidating. 0r stupid, depending 0n wh0's wearing them.

"SHIT. This was supposed to be a surprise!"

Lance: There is nothing I don't see in my domain.

Curry: AW CRAP, we didn't prepare for dragons! We don't have any Ice!

"WE DON'T NEED IT! We can DO this!"

"So are my Pokemon, just so you know."

Sollux: actually a l0t 0f us went d0wn with0ut much struggle

"NOT THE POINT, SOLLUX!"

"HELL YEAH! No! Wait! The other one. I'm ready to WIN."

"LET'S GET IT ON!"

>>22606
Ok, see, this? this is why I said you needed Articuno.

GO FOR BROKE

FIGHT!!

"... Oh crap, that's right, you don't actually have any Electric attacks. OH WELL, WE CAN MAKE THIS WORK!"

WAYNE
WAYNE
WAYNE
WAYNE

>>22610
Simple Plan: Shut Up (lyrics)

"That's good work, now hit him with the Drill Pecks!"